Choosing Between Masculinity and Humanity?
Holly Brubach wrote a great piece for the most recent NYT Style Magazine on how “manhood in America has an image problem.” In it, she looks at three new books on various aspects of that topic - Guyland by Michael Kimmel, Brocabulary by Daniel Maurer and Hysterical Men by Mark S. Micale. According to Kimmel (as quoted by Brubach), “masculinity is a homosocial experience, performed for, and judged by other men.” He goes on to say (and I paraphrase) that the success of that performance boils down to a single rule of manhood, from which all of it (wealth, power, status, strength, physicality) derives - “to demonstrate constantly and repeatedly, that you are not gay.”
Brubach closes her discussion with another Kimmel idea…why not “appeal to boys on the strength of the notion that they shouldn’t be forced to choose between their masculinity and their humanity.”
All of this just makes me wonder how marketing teams may be hindered by what men and women bring to the table from their individual life experiences or patterning of masculine/feminine expectations. If showing emotions or talking about them is emasculating, do men just disengage and let the women on the team “explain” women to them? That would be a tragedy for the future of marketing, if so.
Anyway -
If this sort of discussion intrigues you, you may want to take a look at a recent AMA Marketing News blog post that discusses gender stereotyping in today’s culture. If it REALLY intrigues you - please email me, as I am building a research panel that will dig deeper.
September 10th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Women are emotional and men are rational is such an old concept. Aren’t sports the epitome of an emotional activity?
Let’s get past this. Too often I see women taking advantage of perceived gender differences to make life more comfortable and less challenging for themselves. I’m sorry to see it, but as times get tough in the U.S. it seems to be going that way.
September 10th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
As a man working in a “women’s market”, I can identify with this post from the way my buddies (non-colleagues) speak with me about my profession. They don’t. They have no concept of my work life and seem to avoid the discussion entirely. Maybe it is out of fear of potentially uncovering how uncomfortable they are talking about women in a manner that is not masculine. Or maybe, as noted, they’re afraid of appearing gay — even to me.
September 10th, 2008 at 4:40 pm
How we get past this is the question, definitely, Joan. And somehow making sure that men feel comfortable getting into these sorts of discussions will be crucial. The more guys like you, Kevin, can maybe nudge more men to ponder/consider/mull this gender/masculinity stuff, the better for everyone. I’m loving talking to more men (mainly in the marketing field) about this, myself. However, I’d love to see more of you (and hear about it!) join in the challenge. Even a casual conversation with a fellow conference or tradeshow attendee can bring about small changes in thinking…